Thursday, March 4, 2010

Hirsute-riffic plants

I have a confession to make:  I like hairy plants!

It's not meant to sound salacious, but hairy plants are awesome in their furriness.  It feel like they're diverging from their normal evolution.  A plant that yearns to be mammal, like my dog yearns to be human, have opposable thumbs and sit at the dinner table holding shiny things that shove food into her mouth.

Hairy plants are the closest thing to a pet that a person can have that you won't have close of an emotional bond to and feel guilty about if they decide to kick the bucket out of neglect from your silly self.

You just want to name a plant when it has fur.  Like this one is called Dotty:

My lambsears are unoriginal in their given name: Super Lamb-tastic (I have 4 patches of this stuff and they all are called the same thing.  It's like a hive collective mentality.  Borgs anyone?):

The Cuban Oregano I am dubbing to be Libre:

Even tomatoes are a little hairy when they get bigger, but as there are so many varieties and those names are interesting already, I'll let them keep those given names. (Random fact, did you know that tomatoes might be considered carnivorous?)

While velvet-y plants (lambsears are hairy and velvety to me... I think the gray color is closer to hair in my mind) are equally cool as hairy ones, but the velvet-y plants  just make me think of cloth and drapery. And I hate drapery.  Perhaps this is why I probably let my buck apiece violets die in my cold sunroom over the winter.  That and I always can never get them to rebloom and they just make me feel grandmotherly.  Nothing against grandmothers! (I love mine a lot!) But the idea of ever  being one is just weird.

I need more hairy plants, ones that will keep me warm for the upcoming winter!  I keep my house thermostat set so low... maybe this would be an ideal, green way to insulate a house!  Hirsute Plant Jungle House!  Are there any living hairy viney plants that would be ideal to be a scarf?  They have those wooly pouch plant holder things, purses with plants in them, why not a scarf?

A purple wandering Jew plant I have (Tradescantia pallida purpurea?)  is a nice color, doesn't need to much room for roots:

... I wonder if it's crochet-able?

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